Succeed for Yourself — Don’t Mind Other People’s Reaction

When you show yourself to the world and display your talents, you naturally stir all kinds of resentment, envy, and other manifestations of insecurity… you cannot spend your life worrying about the petty feelings of others

–Robert Greene, The 48 Laws of Power

Has it ever happened in your life, when you have achieved something great, other people — were not so proud of you — and might even have said that what you did was wrong.

Things like that really happen — and can even be considered common. If you’re living in an ideal environment with supportive people, then consider yourself lucky.

Does that mean that some people are really bad? By saying “bad,” you are either labeling people as either “bad” or “good.” Ponder on this, bad people can have good behaviors too, and good people can have bad behaviors too. The keyword is “behavior.” Each one of us is capable of doing behaviors that can be labeled as “good” as well as “bad.”

For example, you’re in a sports team, and you wanted to be your best. So, when you’re other teammates are partying — you are training. When they are slacking off — you are working hard. It goes on — for weeks — then months.

Then one day, you and your teammates realized that you have become the best player in the team. Suddenly, some of your teammates are labeling you as a “snob,” saying that you don’t go with them on night-outs. You are confused by their new behavior because you don’t remember mistreating them, you even go with them sometimes, but not most of the time.

In that case, the best thing to do is to ignore them. You don’t even have to explain yourself, aside from a simple statement, such as, “Sorry, I didn’t go because I want to practice to become a better player.”

There are times when you can’t explain why people are treating you badly. It may be that they really behave that way, or that something that you have done or achieved makes them feel uncomfortable.

As time goes by, you will have interactions with different people, who may like or dislike you. If you have a choice, surround yourself with supportive people.

If it’s the case that you’ll be with the people who resent you for a while, then — don’t ever stop doing the thing that you are supposed to do. I said that because some people “sabotage” themselves, when they realize that people don’t like them anymore. By reverting to their former selves, they think that  those people will like them again. Remember that this can happen unconsciously, so it’s important to keep your guard up.

If you ever see signs of disapproval from other people, it does not always mean that you are wrong and they are right — it may even be the opposite case. Sometimes, people can be jealous and insecure — so just ignore them — and become the successful person you deserve to be.


2 thoughts on “Succeed for Yourself — Don’t Mind Other People’s Reaction

  1. Thank you for this! I’ve also heard this being described as the “crab mentality”…when crabs are in a boiling pot, if one tries to get to the top the others clamor to keep him down. Your posting was much more positive, so thank you for that lighter spin to it. 🙂

    • You’re welcome. I live in the Philippines too, it’s common for people here to know about “crab mentality.” What’s interesting to point out is that phenomenon is not unique to Filipinos, as some version of the story says:

      “A foreigner was watching a Filipino fisherman who’s catching crabs. He noticed that the container where the fisherman stores the captured crabs — was not covered. The foreigner asked, “Why don’t you cover the container? Won’t the crabs escape?” The fisherman answered, “There is no need for that. Because they are Filipino crabs, they will drag down other crabs who tries to escape.”

      What that story is implying is that “crab mentality” is unique only to Filipinos. The reality is that it’s not… That kind of mentality can be seen in some people of all nations — in short — it’s human nature.

      But as in any story that is passed orally, there are different versions of that story. That version by the way, is the one I heard before that stuck with me. I used to believe what is implied:

      “Filipinos have crab mentality,” but not anymore. To think of it — thinking “crab mentality” is unique to Filipinos (or to any nationality for that matter) is a form of “crab mentality.” Hahaha!

      Thank you for replying in my post 🙂

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